England and football

England Football teamYou can’t help noticing that there is a World Cup tournament on the way. Every shop in London is selling England shirts, towels, flipflops, bedlinnen, flags, mugs at the moment. It is going to be great fun to be here, experiencing it all. I wonder if they are more crazy than the Dutch when it comes to football. I actually think they are.

There is a lot of pressure on the team though. Sven (the Swedish Chef) is leaving after this. And Rooney (Shrek) broke his foot, last Saturday, very unfortunately, and quite a loss for the team. It has been exactly 40 years since the English won a Worldcup (or a cup at all actually).

It is the only thing every man (well most of them anyway) in this country is talking about at the moment and today an email was send around in the office, with some rules for (ignorant) women during the World Cup.

Extremely important advice and recommendations to be passed on to wives, girlfriends, fianc?s, mothers, sisters, daughters, etc. (to all women in general) These rules are to be communicated prior to the World Cup in June/July this year…

LIST OF RULES (I shortened it a bit, and selected the most funny ones)

1. From 9th June to 9th July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.

2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye).

3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don?t mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me.

6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say ?get over it, its only a game?, or ?don?t worry, they?ll win next time?. If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called ?words of encouragement? will only lead to a break up or divorce.

7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying ?one? game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to ?spend time together?.

10. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying ?but you have already seen this…why don?t you change the channel to something we can all watch???, the reply will be: ?Refer to Rule #2 of this list?.

Thank you for your co-operation.

Men of the World

I thought it was rather funny. It got even better when, right after reading this mail, one of my female (Italian) colleagues asked : Is the World Cup this year ?

I am a bit cut off from Dutch football, so how are they doing ? Should I invest in buying a Holland shirt or what ? (There are plenty of them here in London too.)