Why does my heart feel so …

Jonathan at sea
Jonathan at sea

First of all, I missed Bill Nighy on the BBC Breakfast show this morning and that is a very bad start of the day if you are me. Bill has been in Tanzania with Oxfam to lobby for the G8 meeting, which, as you all know, is currently held in Germany.

Secondly, if you are waiting for The Girl In The Cafe DVD – I am so sorry for the long wait. I am pulling out my hair as we speak as several DVD’s managed to get lost again and I try not to go nuts about it. Hard, but I manage. I am working on it so please have a little bit more patience, she will come to you eventually! And there is a big post coming up with 2 reviews on the film from 2 friendly people who have participated. Stay tuned!

As a third, the title of this post refers to my state of mind. I am back at work after a day in bed and suddenly there are only 3 days left in my current job. And while I am typing things like “response.write” in my code editor, I am realizing that 3 days from
now I will never write things like that again. If I will – something somewhere has gone terribly wrong.

If you’d ask me what I will be doing on the 18th of June (my first day on the new job) I could not give you an answer, I have no idea. I know that I no longer will take my Caterham train but bus 88 and the tube. I know that Croydon will be replaced with Notting Hill. I know that I will have about 7 colleagues in stead of 35. But I hope that I at some point will be close to a film camera in stead of close to a computer.

One of the first things I have to do is a 2 day course where I will learn about Railway Safety (how sexy can it get really), as most film work will be done on/around/close to rails and trains. But how a day in the office will look like – I really don’t know. And that feels very weird. It really feels like jumping from the highest tower and not knowing what I am jumping in to. Could be a load of smelly bits, could be heaven.

Oh, and I’m afraid I’ve signed up for something strangely odd again. Guess what I picked. And no I don’t exactly know what I am supposed to do here either but if it is citing a couple of scenes from The Girl In The Cafe I am fine I guess. Just to add a disclaimer – if too scary (like citing it on Trafalgar Square for a whole lot of people), I won’t do it.

… weird, is probably the right word.

In my horoscope today:
You are falling into Jupiter’s trap of dreaming about that wonderful pie in the sky. It’s not that you fully lose touch with reality; you don’t. Even if you are too logical for that, you are still intrigued by the creative possibilities. Go ahead and take a risk, as long as it’s not more than you can handle.

6 thoughts to “Why does my heart feel so …”

  1. Don’t worry. I recently went from working for a company with 2,000 employees to one where there are 9. I also moved away from coding to go into Usability and Accessibility.

    It will seem wierd for a couple of days and then like anything else, you will get used to it.

    Good luck.

  2. So you have to memorise a whole film, or just your version of it? And then you recite it whilst others recite theirs? So no-one’s actually listening?
    I’m confused!!

  3. @Mark – thank you. I also think it will be fine. I think.

    @grigorisgirl – well you understand as much about it as I do. They have a meeting tomorrow which I think I will attend, that will probably shed some light on it all. But it seem strangely odd.

  4. @Grigorisgirl : thank you, thank you, thank you.
    I now found his 3 minute film on the BBC website. It’s great (see next post).

    And not the least important.

  5. It’s exciting and scary at the same time, but you know in your heart that you are doing a good thing for yourself. Rail safety – now that will give you a wealth of material to blog about, I’m sure!!

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